For nearly a year before my wedding, Jacqui and I began the invitation process to these, so called, family and friends. We called, texted, emailed, Facebooked and even sent out over 125 personally-customized wedding invitations through the mail.
Jacqui and I live in Albuquerque, NM and all of my family and friends live in Mobile, AL where I grew up. So, in order to be convenient to THEM, we went through the tedious process of planning a wedding there in my hometown... 1300 miles away!
I've longed believed that you get out of a marriage what you put into the wedding. And instead of eloping and having small reception, I wanted to have a formal wedding to share with everyone in order to promote a life-long, happy marriage together.
In order to save money on the wedding, Jacqui and her friend, Brihanna, began custom-designing all of the wedding decorations and mementos. They spent well over 200 hours preparing everything, only to load it into my small Jeep Compass and drive all the way to Mobile, AL with it stuffed alongside luggage and three bodies. Come wedding day, the bridesmaids woke up at 4am and started preparing the venue. The venue basically only provided a building... EVERYTHING else was payed for and prepared by Jacqui and the bridesmaids. They did an amazing job, though... everything looked perfect!
While the ladies were prepping the venue, etc., my sole responsibility was to not look retarded. So, the groomsmen and I spent the day at the hotel getting ready for the big event. We were supposed to be at the venue at 3pm, but decided to take a few shots of Patron an roll in a few minutes (fashionably) late. As we were pulling into the parking lot, my heart dropped; there were only 3 other cars at the venue.
A few more people trickled in over the next 30 minutes, but by the time we started the ceremony, 85% of the seats were empty. Hardly any of my friends and family showed up to our wedding; No phone calls, no texts, no emails, no Facebook messages, and no negative RSVPs in the mail.
I kept a smile on my face, but I was dying inside. How could everyone ditch me? I mean, if the wedding was even 100 miles outside of town, I could understand not attending due to unforeseen circumstances. But I brought the wedding to THEM!! I sacrificed money that I could NOT afford to sacrifice in order to not be an inconvenience to them. All I wanted was for my friends and family to be a part of our special day together. It's as though my life event held the same weight as a used tissue... just thrown in the garbage.
Jacqui's family probably has less money than my white trash family and they still managed to make sacrifices to be there. Hell, her dad even sold his car to get funds to travel 1300 miles to Mobile. And my "friends and family" couldn't go out of their way to drive 5 minutes... SERIOUSLY!!!???
Other than my groomsmen, two friends of mine showed up (thanks Shay, and Craig). TWO!!! How is that even conceivable!!?? Of living relatives, 2/3 grandparents, 3/4 uncles, 1/2 aunts, 2/3 brothers, and countless cousins, second-cousins, etc. decided that this wasn't important enough for them to attend. I did get a call/text from two friends, Andre and Ryan, telling me they couldn't make it. Cool. I almost built a list of "friends and family" that are currently dead to me for not even giving me a heads up on not being there. I got about twelve names deep and decided, fuck it!
I'm tired of burning bridges when my panties get all in a wad. The people that blew me off know that they hurt me. It's a good thing, though... 'cause now I know who my TRUE family and friends are. The people that I can count on through thick and thin. For all of you that made a sacrifice to be at our wedding, we love you! For all that couldn't make it and gave us a heads up, thank you! For all the rest of you... well, I think this post says enough.
